I am going to be using blogging as a coping skill today.
It has been brought to my attention that I have kind of clammed up since leaving residential. I'm not as open and forthcoming with my treatment team. I'm not all about feelings and trust and asking for help.
Oh, you are concerned?
You would like to know why?
**Flash back to the end of June**
(We'll just do a quick run-through here so no one gets too bored...)
Seriously, dude. I have never had as much of a connection with a therapist as I had with my case worker in residential who shall remain unnamed.
So what is the problem? Why would I NOT want to go make a million more therapist connections? That was AWESOME!!! But, wait? Why do I need a new therapist?
None of that counts, because it was a job. I was the patient, she was the case worker. Don't get me wrong - I know very well that she cares about her patients and does what she does because she honestly wants them to thrive in the real world. I myself have been in the exact same position so many times. I don't hold it against her one bit. If she didn't have those boundaries, she would burn out and no one else would get to benefit from that spark she carries around that makes her so undeniably fucking awesome.
But excuse me for not wanting to open up to a new therapist right now. I'm still getting over the best one I've ever had in my life and NO I DON'T WANT TO TALK ABOUT HER WITH YOU BECAUSE YOU WILL NEVER BE AS GOOD AS HER SO STOP ASKING.
I am fine.
What. In the hell. Is going on.
I haven't blogged in a few weeks. 4 1/2 to be exact. A lot has happened since then. Bear with me as my brain is not functioning at its usual .....?......can't think of the word. Dear god. Well, that is number one on the list to discuss! Here we go!
So, you know. Here I am, not dying after all. (Who knew?) Overly stressed, incredibly anxious, blindly walking forward through this uncharted territory that people call "eating like a normal human being should." Fighting for my life, yadda yadda yadda. A few tip toes back, but mostly strides forward. Props to my rebels who have been with me every step of the way. Thank you so much to all of my friends and family who have continued to shower me with support and kind words and gestures. Nothing goes unnoticed and everything has been greatly appreciated. My family could not do any of this without you. I love you all.
Check out our new website at www.rebelagainstED.org
Mother and wife by day, psych RN by night. So many different ways to view life. I try to take everything in and be very slow to judge.