Talk about being kicked when you're down. I am so beyond frustrated, and annoyed, and overwhelmed that I don't know what to do with myself. I've been trying different tactics to get rid of any of the stress-energy I have. And by energy, I mean those short bursts of panic in between the random narcolepsy that has been plaguing me these past few days. I've tried cleaning different rooms in the house from top to bottom. (Moving very carefully.) I've tried reading, and knitting, and drinking all different types of tea. Occasionally I'll sit down on the couch and just crash for an hour or two. I've had to limit the physical things due to tearing my brand-spanking-new scar tissue a few days ago, so that's been fun. Absolutely nothing is good enough.
I shouldn't say that. The love and support and countless hugs I am getting from my husband are helping more than anything. I am so glad that he is able to hold it together in times of crisis at home, because I am completely useless. I lose my sh*t when it comes to anything going wrong with my family. The tough Marine facade is crumbling into a heaping pile of snot and tears.
Sorry if I just flung myself off that pedestal you had me perched on.