It's about that time again.
No matter how tired I am all day long, once the stars come out, my adrenaline kicks in and my body says, "it's go time."
Much like a werewolf, my personality drastically changes with the moonlight. I have been told several times that I am like two completely different people. I like to consider it my own way of multitasking in my life...I don't make an effort to change - it's like a switch being turned on and off. I think most people are this way. I just do it backwards! Instead of being afraid of what lurks in the darkness, I find it comforting. Somehow I feel ten feet tall and bulletproof once the sun is done setting. It's my chance to show everyone what I'm good at and to do what I really enjoy doing. It's the time of day I get to spend giving back and trying to help however I possibly can. It is the time I get to spend being the me I always envisioned.
This also saps a lot of energy from some pretty weary bones here.
My daytimes are spent running from the sun. I cringe when I have to go to an appointment in the middle of the day (how would YOU feel if your dentist was only available at 3am?) And there are so many people out during the day...how can you all stand it?! It is sensory overload to go from being one of the few people awake to being one of thousands of people awake in town. The noises seem louder and I find myself getting irritable when people slam doors (I quickly picked up the habit of shutting doors silently when I started working overnights) or when chatter gets too high. I'm like a librarian, wanting to walk around and shush people all day.
I probably need to work on this.
For now, I am happy with my quiet darkness. The sense of solitude and autonomy invigorates me. It charges me up for the coming day. It makes me comfortable and it makes me happy. It's a schedule that is conducive to my personality. In a way, I think my body was built for it. I've always had trouble feeling rested after a night's sleep. I like being able to hear everyone else going about their business when I am crawling into bed for my own nighttime. It fits me.
I think I truly have become a creature of the night....and it doesn't bother me a bit.
Mother and wife by day, psych RN by night. So many different ways to view life. I try to take everything in and be very slow to judge.